Friday, October 10, 2008

The Wonderful Behaviors of 4 Year Olds

Our latest teaching endeavors in our house have been challenging. N really is a sweet boy, but lately he's really become an expert in the field of whining and screaming. There have been many moments where I wanted to scream too (and did), but I do think we're making progress. I tried the ignoring thing, but for N, that just made him whine and scream louder. So, now when he whines at me, I tell him "I can't hear you when you talk like that," and I think it's working! He's catching on, and sometimes he'll talk nicely before I even say anything! Yay!

Our other thing we're working on is obeying. I'm starting to think that 4 year olds are incapable of understanding that word. N can be very helpful and obedient, but only when he wants to be. The last couple of days it has gotten particularly bad. Every time I ask him to do something, he just says, "No!" I try to always ask him to do things in a kind way, but all I get is a nasty "No!" So, today he's spent more time than usual in time out. By the end of the day, I had had it! I felt like I was going to have a nervous break down, and every time he asked for something, I just wanted (and did) to say "No!" so he could get a taste of his own medicine. Spiteful, I know, but it was either that or go insane or beat him black and blue.

I really don't know what to do. Please, all you experience mothers, tell me what to do! How do you teach your children to be obedient without nagging them or punishing them all the time for when they're not obedient. When it comes to punishing, I don't know what to do because he's such a drama king. Every time he goes to time out he screams and cries and scream some more, and it takes him so long to calm down that both of us have forgotten why he was in trouble in the first place. I try to always show my gratitude for when he is obedient, but I guess it's not enough. I'm kind of wondering if part of it is an attention thing. I'm noticing that he might be getting a little jealous of the attention that C gets. I think I'm going to try really hard to give him more positive attention and more one on one time. I'm hoping that will help his overall behavior.

I didn't want this blog to me my place for venting parenting frustrations, but I really needed to do it tonight! I promise not to do this very often. Just PLEASE help me!! I need your advice! And I'm sure your advice will benefit everyone because I better not be the only one with a stubborn, strong willed child!

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